


I Want To End Me

by KatzKrazy101



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Anal Play, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Dragons, Elf/Human Relationship(s), Eventual Relationships, Eventual Smut, Everyone Needs A Hug, Falling In Love, Fluff and Humor, Food Fight, Friends to Lovers, Gay Sex, Love Confessions, M/M, Mild Gore, Minor Character Death, Missions, Past Abuse, Past Relationship(s), Sad, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Top Dorian Pavus, War
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-10
Updated: 2020-06-11
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:46:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24645871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KatzKrazy101/pseuds/KatzKrazy101
Summary: DESTRUCTIONCHAOSJEALOUSLYLEADERPOWERLUSTDEVOTIONBETRAYAL"Inquisitor!"The Dalish Elf had no idea what he was getting into. If he wasn't there. But now he has tonworry about others. Powers. And much other dark things.
Relationships: Male Lavellan/Dorian Pavus
Kudos: 2
Collections: Dragon Age Inquisition





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The characters are not mine! The only character that belongs to me is my OC Mahanon. And I know the name is there when you boot up the game, and I went with it!

Blank. Blank. Blank  
White. Black.  
Everything is so very dark. Everything is so very cold.  
Pain. Quick. Sharp. Tempting to sleep.  
Shouting. Yelling. Fighting the smell of burning.  
Help. Help. Help!

Mahanon opened his eyes. It was blank at first. And then his mind was interrupted with what had happened. He was sent here by his Keeper. But he looked upon the destroyed Conclave. He moved and sat up or what he could call sitting up. He noticed soldiers he had never seen in his life before. He felt weak, and his left arm tingled in a numbing way. And everything went black again.

Voices. Tingling. Tempting you to wake. You will be punished.  
You are at fault for what happened.  
We need you.  
We want you dead.  
Will you be our savior?  
Our final saving grace?  
Maker be with you!

Mahanon woke again. This time the scenery was very different. It seemed he was in a cell area. Was he being jailed? He had done nothing. He could barely remember what happened. He then saw a woman. In shining armor no doubt. She walked like a serpent ready to strike. 

"The Conclave is destroyed. And you are the lone survivor. Did you start this?" The woman spat at Mahanon. She was frowning, and she was furious to the looks of her. She drew her sword and pointed it at Mahanon. Mahanon swallowed. He was utterly confused by this entire situation. 

"I d-don't know how this happened. I didn't do anything." He said quickly. His light blue eyes looking up into the woman's dark brown ones. She seemed upset with answer and grabbed him roughly until she was stopped by a red-haired woman. 

"Cassandra! We need him!" The woman said. She latched onto Cassandra's shoulder. Mahanon, wasn't as scared as he should be. Even though Dalish avoided Shems, he always had encounters with them. But this was very different. Then his arm erupted with pain. On his left, hand a glowing green mark. It subsided and it left his arm numb. 

"We don't have time. We will judge you later. Be lucky I am not going to kill you now. Will you help us, mage?" Cassandra said with a blunt tone. As if she just wanted to use him and toss him away under the carpet. 

"I will try. But what exactly am I supposed to be doing?" He said as he was freed from the cuffs he was locked in. He rubbed his wrists. He realized he didn't even have his staff with him. Maybe, it was lost at the Conclave but he could not remember. 

"It will be better it I show you prisoner." Cassandra said. "Don't try anything or you life will be taken from you." She said cooly as she walked away from Mahanon. And he quickly followed behind her. He noticed a lot of people that were around. 

They were now outside. Mahanon noticed the woman before him stopped. Her black hair fluttering in the wind. He was curious as to why they had stopped. He wanted to help. He had never really turned down humans when they needed help. His long ginger blond hair also fluttering. He looked up and saw the big hole in the sky. 

"Will you truly help us?" She finally said, after the stretch of the silence had gone way to far. Mahanon thought about this. He was utterly confused, but he needed to help. Well, he surely felt like he needed to help. He nodded. 

"I will try the best, I can. That is all I can offer." He said softly. He watched as Cassandra gave him an approving look of his answer, unlike she had done before. 

"Come then." She said and she began to jog off. Mahanon right behind her. He wanted to ask some questions. He had a lot of them. But he wondered if the task at hand was dangerous. He then came to a halt when he saw the doors of the bridge they were on. He felt himself tingle. Magic was around in the area. The area seemed so calm from what he saw at first. Until he went through the gates. Rocks that glowed green exploded from the hole that was in the sky and they landed around them. 

Mahanon kept pace with Cassandra. And he made sure to listen to whatever she was saying. And then things started to get more dangerous as Cassandra shouted. 

"Demons! Be careful!" She said and she unsheathed her swords and began slashing at the demon that was in front of her. It looked like a despair demon. But, there was many more. Some a bright green color. And they surrounded them. Mahanon had no way of attack and then he saw a staff. He grabbed it quickly. And he smiled. He felt his magic grow as he shot out lightening to help Cassandra kill the demon. 

The fight was harder then he had let on. He had knew demons were tough. But this was different. They must be coming from the fade? He thought to himself but that was interrupted. When Cassandra pointed her sword at him again. 

"Drop the staff!" She snarled at him. Mahanon was confused and this was quite upsetting. What was he going to do? Prance around with demons, and hope to the Maker that he would survive. He rolled his eyes, but he stood defensive. 

"I'm not going in there with a shit load of demons, without the staff. We are fighting demons!" He snapped back her defensively. He didn't like the slightly disapproving look that Cassandra gave him. And then she huffed. 

"Let's keep moving." She said and she began running off again. Mahanon followed after like a lost druffalo. He then was hit with a magical force that knocked him off his feet. His knees landing in the snow and making his pants wet and cold. As if he needed that at the moment. He gripped his staff and he sent lightening everywhere. He then stood and he threw a barrier around himself and Cassandra. Even though he saw that she could handle herself. He knew she was a warrior. But he has met a lot worse. 

He fought with all he had. And when the last of it was done, another elf. A apostate grabbed his arm and held it to the tear. His hand burst out a bolt of green and it was a sharp intense pain. And he tore his hand away. And it was closed. 

"Well done." The apostate said. He was smiling at him. Mahanon, rubbed his arm as it was numb again. He was getting ready to speak when someone else had decided to join in. 

"Good thing you were here kid. I thought we would have been ass deep in demons forever." The dwarf said. He chuckled jokingly. Mahanon looked at Cassandra, and she did not look happy at all the the male was here. 

"What was it that I just did?" Mahanon questioned looking at the apostate. He would eventually want to know the name of everyone he would come to encounter. If he was even granted that, if he survived. 

"Ha. My name is Solas. I guess we might have been skipping introductions. You closed a rift with the mark that bares upon your hand." Solas said in a calm manner. As it what happened was matter of fact. He was surprised. Mahanon has many, many questions. 

Then someone else came in with a lot more soldiers. This man was wearing a fur mantle and he has blond hair. 

"Cassandra! Thank the maker. We honestly thought we would lose more due to the rift." The man said. "Who closed it?" He quickly added. Cassandra looked over at Mahanon. 

"The prisoner did." She said calmly, yet it did have a bit of bitterness in it. But Mahanon knew she probably meant well, but he couldn't guess that, not yet anyway. He looked at the man and gave a confirming nod. 

"Well, you were in the right place when we needed you. But the Breach—" The blond haired man said. But looked over when he heard a cry of pain. Mahanon, was gripping his hand tightly as it pulsed with the "breach". Mahanon then looked up at them all. 

"I assume, we need to seal the breach?" Mahanon could assume that as what the blond was saying. He gripped his arm gently, as the pain went back to being a tingling numbness. This was going to be something he would get used to. He wasn't really prepared to, be doing any of this. Oh, he prayed in his head. He prayed to all his gods and to the Maker. 

————————————————————————

Mahanon, and the rest of them had made a path to get to the Breach. It was successful, but many were lost. This was stressful, and it was all but painful. As Mahanon watched people he didn't know, fall and wither and die. And he himself would lose mana and stamina due to how hard he was fighting. He wanted to save them. All of them. But in the back of his mind, he knew that he couldn't save everyone. 

Once the Breach was sealed, there was still the matter of the hole there. But they had grabbed him and rushed him back to what the people call Haven. But he had no memory of it happening. As everything is as black yet again 

You. You have ruined my plan.  
How dare you?  
We need you.  
You will be our next leader.  
Pain. Death.  
You cannot save them all.  
They will all die because of you.  
Be our savior.  
May the maker be with you.


	2. Meeting The Tevinter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is where Mahanon meets his love. *cough* Well they meet, and a blah right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ha! So you made it to the second of many chapters! Wonderful. 
> 
> I want to point out that this story isn't entirely game dialouged based. It was either summarized by me. And neither will all the chapters be game canon.

(Major Time Skip)

Mahanon wasn't expecting to be travelling to Redcliffe, but there he was, but he knew why, for some odd reasonings the mages were somehow silent when he had talked to Fiona about closing the breach so he had to investigate. So he decided to take the apostate, named Solas. And also Cassandra and Varric. Not like he had much of options when he travelled to these places in the first place. He hadn't made any allies yet, but he was sure that he would. As much as he loved these people, Cassandra and Varric could be a hassle because they fought way to much for anyone to handle, and Mahanon hated conflict. He was admiring the small town, the buildings looking well aged, and some didn't. Some looked like they had been covered in plants, like it was abandoned. But many of the people seemed nice. They had a lot of diversity to them. Mostly either human, or they were elves. Mahanon was lucky, some of them would be slaves. He read this when he was in his clan. It was mostly in Tevinter, but he knew that was a joke by his Clan leader as he knew if they were there they would just be slaves or worse. 

He hadn't noticed that they had all walked up to a tavern. Mahanon was to caught up in his thoughts to think about where he was going. He could hear from the outside that it was pretty normal for what a tavern was. He looked back and he decided to see what he party thought for a moment. Cassandra looked serious, Varric was probably bored, and Solas...It was Solas. Mahanon didn't have to ask. He pushed the door open and he was greeted with the smell of alchol and bread. There were people scattered everywhere. He saw a man, that had "invited" him there. 

Mahanon walked with his party to the male, as he observed the area. The tavern was quite nice, and decent. It did smell of wood and moss as some of the places were either withering and rotting from age, or they just got old. Mahanon was in for a surprise when he saw Fiona. He walked faster but he was stopped by the Magister with his words. 

"Hello, friend! Nice to see you. I was wondering something about an offer?" He spoke. Mahanon ponderd on this. He looked at the group. Magister, another man, and Fiona. This was odd. He had just talked to her not to long ago. Mahanon only nodded. "And what is this offer, pray tell?" He said. The Magister gave a small chuckle. "Mages of course for, a higher reward. As they now belong to me." He spoke gently. 

Mahanon was perplexed by this. How could this be? He shook his head, and looked at Fiona. Who also seemed perplexed. Odd. Mahanon thought and he spoke. "Fiona, didn't I already talk to you?" He asked. Fiona stood there and shook her head. "The Magister offered something, and we decided to let him own RedCliffe and the mages here." She spoke. She seemed very certain. Like the encounter between them never happened. 

They were cut short however, when the other man "acted" faint. But the Masgister looked concerned. Mahanon wae about to go over, but it seemed the Magister had reached the other man. "Felix...Come on, let's go rest.." He spoke. He stood and walked away but stood beside Mahanon. "Another time, perhaps?" And he walked away. 

The man named Felix walked away, but he bumped into Mahanon as he stepped back. He gave a slight frown, but he felt something in his pocket. A note. He opened it. 'Go down into the lower levels...Help.' The note scared Mahanon but he was oddly curious. He turned and faced his party. 

"This is strange. Fiona acted like we had never met before. And the Magister.." He said quietly to make sure no one else heard. The other nodded. Cassandra frowned. "This is odd." She spoke. Mahanon walked away and he then came upon a long hallway and a staircase that went down with massive doors at the end. He sighed, this was his new job and he would have to just get used to it after all. He made his way down the long path of stairs. Dust puffed around their feet as they jogged down. Mahanon heard fighting. So, he pushed open the door. He walked in, and he saw a man weilding a staff and was killing demons. A rift apparent in this room. 

The man killed the demons, and they went back to the Fade. The man with dark hair and a mustache turned to him and gave him a smile. In these situation, who would smile? Mahanon was going to question the other but couldn't. 

"Help me with this, would you?" Then the rift exploded with demons. Mahanon quickly sent barriers over everyone. Cassandra charged at the demons with her axe, Solas sent ice magic, and Varric arrows. Mahanon watched and he sent electricity out. 

He watched some of the demons stop as they were electrocuted. But as soon as he could get smug about a small victory, he was violently shoved as a demon jumped in front of him knocking him down. He was glad for the others to help, as the unknown man that they had saw before shoot out fire at the demon, but the motion seemed slow. Time seemed in some areas were slower and some faster, the demon falling back and dying, and it going back into the fade. Mahanon had stood back up, his hand pulsed as he lifted his hand to the rift and he closed it when he yanked his hand back. Sometimes he could feel the numbing pain, bit he was getting used to it. He looked at the other man with some caution, as he but he staff on his back. 

"Do you even know how that works?" The man asked, looking straight at Mahanon. Mahanon face flushed a little bit, as he looked at the man. He seemed unsure of how the anchor really worked, he kind of just did it. But before he could open his mouth to answer, the man started to speak again. "You don't even know, do you? Fascinating." The man said. This was true. The only person who could really speak for the mark that was placed on his hand and that was Solas. Mahanon stood silent, but then it came to him. He wanted to know the males name, as he had never seen anyone like this before. 

"Who are you?" Mahanon asked. His voice was soft as ring velvet, but it wasn't as deep as a normal man, and also he had a weird accent. His brows, raised a little bit as he looked at the male. He watched as the other man looked amused from the time they first met him, and then when they were fighting, and just now. Mahanon felt a tad bit off putted from this. Who could act this way? But he didn't want to make any outlandish assumptions just yet about this man. 

"Oh, pardon my manners. I am Dorian of House Pavus." Dorian said amusingly, as if this wasn't a serious matter at all. He seemed so carefree and flowing. It was charming in a sense. 

Cassandra looked at Mahanon. "Don't get to close, this man is of Tevinter." She spoke gently. Mahanon spared her a glance before he looked back at Dorian. "Where is Felix, I was expecting him to be here?" He asked gently. Dorian gave him a look, "He is trying to get away. I am the one who wrote the note." He said. His tone was playful, and it was rather relaxing to listen to. 

"Alexius, is tearing up the world. You saw the rift? How it slowed others down, and sped things up. But, why would he do that for a few hundred lackeys?" Dorian said. Mahanon was shocked by this, he was sure they all had noticed the same about this rift. "That would be dangerous if that were true.." He heard Solas speak monotonely. Dorian smirked and shook his head. "I helped developed this magic. As Alexius used to be my mentor." 

Mahanon wae about to ask something when Felix came down. "Dorian, I don't think it was for lackeys. It was for a cult called the Venatori. Whatever he has done it was to get to you." Felix stated. Dorian looked at Felix and then back to Mahanon. "Why me?" He posed. Dorian had his hand on his chin in thought, and brought it down. "Maybe, you pose as a threat as you can close the rifts?" Dorian said. It sounded more unsure. "Father, wanted you gone that was for sure. Since, I know you had previosuly talked to the mages." Felix added. 

"He changed the time, so that he was at the conclave before the Divine died." Mahanon said. He had thought abiut the cyrrent coverstations and the current events. Dorian smiled and gave a hum. "You catch on quick." He quibbed. Mahanon hummed back. He looked at Felix. "Why would you go against your father?" He asked. It wasn't anything to be rude or offensive. 

"Cults? Time magic? I love my father and my country but this needs to stop." Felix said. He didn't sound offputted as Mahanon thought. Dorian nodded. "Alexius doesn't know I am here. And I would like to keep it that way. If you face him, I want to be there. I will keep in touch. And Felix, tried not to get yourself killed." Dorian spome as he disappeard. 

"There are worse things then dying, Dorian."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You have made it to the end of Meeting The Tevinter. 
> 
> Fun Fact: Dorian doesn't like tea because something in certain tea(s) he is allergic to.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you had fun reading! 
> 
> Fun Fact: Orange is the only color you can taste!


End file.
